Sports Talk

If the Ravens shut out the 49ers, Baltimore jeweler promises to refund all purchases

There’s going to be a very poor owner at Saxon’s Diamond Centers in Baltimore if the Ravens can shut out the Niners in the Super Bowl; something that has never happened in 46 prior “Big Games”.

That’s because he promised to refund up to $5,000 of purchases made between Saturday and the Super Bowl if the Ravens can do the close-to-impossible and shut out Colin Kaepernick, Michael Crabtree and Randy Moss on the third of February.

This seems like a very good way to pick up sales just in time for Valentine’s Day, as the odds of the Ravens keeping the Niners scoreless is very close to zero percent. They aren’t nearly dysfunctional enough for that to happen. But hey, the future is undecided and what if the Niners pick up a flu virus that decimates their team, or maybe Jim Harbaugh and Andy Reid have a freak accident that switches their brains like in Freaky Friday. Who knows, man.

Basically, people out there who are Ravens fans who were planning on buying someone special jewelry will have added incentive to head to Saxon’s Diamond Centers to buy their bling, even though diamonds aren’t even that rare anymore.

And if the Ravens are shutting out the Niners in the 4th quarter, I’d love for someone to videotape the owner who made this promotion as he thinks about all the money that’s on the line.